Back in September my friend took to social media to state she was not pursuing medical treatment anymore and would be concentrating on her family and arrangements. We hadn't heard anything and respected her desire for privacy and seclusion. She had ovarian cancer, which she beat, but developed other cancers in waves over a long period. Just when she thought she was clear and recovering, another round of chemo.
This was a woman I thought very highly of. Call it a high school crush, call it one of those truly great friendships that upon reflection you realize was one of the greatest things to happen in your life. Yes, I thought she was amazingly beautiful. She was vibrant, she was so full of life, so upbeat and postive. Even her teeth were cute. Yes, I knew she had a great figure, but I never imagined anything or fantasized about her. She was my dear friend I enjoyed spending time with in classes.
She would be working in art class and start humming a song, and it would start playing. Then she'd start another, and it would start playing. And another, and another.
She would quote Meg Ryan's character in 'Top Gun' whenever one of her friends entered a room. The, "Goose, ya big studdddddd" one. She even resembled Meg Ryan, to the point I couldn't watch her movies after graduation, because they reminded me so much of her.
I would go places and wish she was there with me, so I could share the things that gave me fond memories. Locations, experiences, etc.
Around 10th grade she moved to a neighboring school district and I didn't see much of her after that. She worked at the local mall, at the Arby's, so I could see her there every once in awhile.
One day she called me up and asked me if I wanted to go with her to see one of her friend's cheerleading competition. I jumped at the chance, as I'd be able to spend time with her. The competition was a blur, and I don't recall much about it. Blurs of colors, the sounds of shoes on gym floor, the shouts of competition.
I didn't go to my Junior Prom, but decided I wanted to go to the Senior one. I decided to ask the best looking woman I knew. I told my Mom and wanted to ask my friend right, and the 'date' with her gave me that chance. After the winners were chosen and everyone started leaving, we slowly walked down the hall. I psyched myself up. She was walking about ten feet ahead of me, zig-zagging from side to side, running her hands across the lockers. Looking back, I think she suspected something and was giving me time to ask her.
Well, I did. She smiled and told me she would love to go with me. So, we made arrangements. I got the rides all set and got my tux and the corsage, crossed off every T and dotted every I.
The day I went to pick her up, I didn't realize she was at a Classmates house. A different Classmate was getting her pics taken out on the lawn. She pointed inside and I went in the front door, identifying myself to the Lady of the house. Inside, it was a split level, with stairs up and stairs down, and a hallway at the top in front of me. I heard soft padding of feet and then she appeared.
My jaw hit the floor as I beheld the beautiful vision backlit by the windows behind her. She must have seen my reaction, because she smiled and slowly turned around. Sexy was not the first word I thought, or the second. It was more she was beautiful, but this was almost etherial.
We went outside to take pics and I had difficulty trying to attach the corsage. The dress had spaghetti straps and I didn't want to break one trying to lift it slightly to pin the corsage. I also didn't want to poke her with the pin, so putting my fingers between the pin and her skin seemed like the right course of action. Managed after a few tries.
We went to the Prom and we danced. We talked with the others, we enjoyed ourselves for hous.
Afterwards we we got changed and went to the all night party in another part of the college campus. Plenty of activities, food to eat, music to listen too, etc, etc.
We went home the next morning and I walked her to the door. That was the last time I saw her face to face. I went home and took a nap. I called her later to tell her I had a great time, hoped she had, and thanked her for going with me. The only issue I had was the venue got our school colors wrong. We are Purple and White, not whatever blue and white...
Years went by. I heard she had moved South. As the years went by, I wondered what had happened to her. Then I started to notice something in my life. I noticed brunettes, dark haired women, and redheads, but it was the rare blonde that caught my eye. I never really thought about it until about 10 years ago. I decided to do a little scientific study to determine why I wasn't noticing blondes.
It wasn't due to me thinking they were dumb. It wasn't that I thought anything negative. I just didn't think about blondes. Then one night I am in Hollywood Video picking up some movies and from about 20 feet away I notice the cashier. Not just see her, but I noticed her. I looked at her, trying to figure it out. I wasn't staring or leering or acting like a jerk, but just thinking and thinking. She was behind the counter and the monitor, so all I could see was her head and shoulders, and her arms if she leaned left or right. So I knew it wasn't her figure that caught my eye. As the line moved forward I noticed she had short blonde hair off the collar. I got closer and saw she had fair skin. As I got up to pay, I could see her eyes where China plate blue. https://www.google.com/search?q=china+p ... 7&dpr=1.25
I made small talk with her, paid for my movies and left. I got into my car and sat there. After about five minutes of trying to analyze the evidence, the clouds parted and the sun seemed to shine down just on me. This unnamed cashier reminded me of my dear friend, to the point I was subconsciously comparing them to her, and since they weren't her, I didn't give them another thought. Apparently she had made more of an impression on me than even I realized. Call it a breakthrough, but it just fit.
Anyway, fast forward (thank you if you got this far) a bit and we reconnected on Facebook. She told me she was in Florida, married to a great guy, and had a young son. I was glad for her. I always felt that there would never be anything more between us, so I was genuinely happy for her. I told her the gist of what I've written here and she apologized for not knowing how much I thought of her. I told her not to worry. I was just glad to have found her again.
Then the medical issues started happening. The first one, well, she was upset after that one she couldn't have anymore children. I responded with, 'But now you can be the best mother for your son, without being pulled in every direction.' She understood what I meant and she was a devoted Mother. In the hospital she allowed me to call her and talk to her for awhile to catch up.
We all thought everything was all better, and then it started again. More chemo this time. And was getting better.
Then it starts again. Another round of chemo. She loses her beautiful hair as it falls out. She starts to improve afterwards.
Then it starts again. More chemo.
To be honest, I don't know how many times the cancers came back. It seems every two-two and a half years, it was back.
Her Mother had passed away from cancer when before I met her. I prayed and prayed for her recovery each time.
Then Septmeber 2021 comes around. She decides she is done fighting and elects to withdraw from social media. I sent her a very short message, telling her I was still praying for her and I was still willing to write down my memories of her from school, so her son could know what his Mom was like when she was younger. I didn't get a response, and really didn't think she would. That was okay. If she saw it, she saw it. If she didn't, I tried.
Then yesterday I get a message from her Stepmom telling me Kristy passed away on the 3rd, which I didn't get until I woke up. I was like, "Oh God no..."
I couldn't say anything online, as they hadn't broken the news yet. I got on today and our Class of '91 group was reporting it. So many tributes, so many memories. The world is a bit more colder and a bit more darker now, without her light shining.
I will miss her. I will remember her and I will love her in my own way as long as I live. 49 years feels way too young, but it's a lifetime...
I am including a few pics. One is from my Senior Prom. I'm the one with the mustache. Another is her Senior Pic. It;s a little worn because I carried for a long time, until I realized if I lost my wallet or it was stolen, I'd lose it. The other pic is from the bus heading to the after prom party. I was taking pics of everyone and she playfully tried blocking the camera. I can still hear her laughter.
Rest in Peace, dear Kristy, Rest in Peace...
One of 'our' songs...
I haven't cried yet. I have gotten emotional a few times and misty-eyed, but I haven't cried yet. At some point I will her a song, a memory will suddenly pop up and it will be like a dagger straight into my heart. Between my Brother last year and then this, I've lost two great people.
Thanx for letting me vent...
EDIT: I just looked at my senior and noticed the color was a little off. Her eye color appears different. I know a bunch of pics were retouched to remove blemishes and such. Didn't realize it changed some colors.