We're baaaacck!

After a year long hiatus, I'm happy to be presenting the Season 2 premiere of Joe's Cantina. I believe based on the number of pics, this must be considered a special 2 hour episode.

For those who wonder - 'what the hell is Joe's Cantina?', let me just say that it is the culmination of several creative endeavors for me. It combines elements of an original science fiction story I have built my scifi customs verse around, along with a whimsical watering hole in a remote space station that may share certain qualities (and customers) with a certain website we all know and love.

There's a strong chance you won't know all the inside jokes. That's ok. Some are just for my own enjoyment, that's how inside they are. And some involve years-long running jokes based around the membership of this site. Yet, I have tried to make it entertaining even on a very basic level. That said, I think that if you haven't read the past episodes, it may make more sense to do so before digging into this one. Below is an index of the key stories and mini-stories that have appeared thus far. Also take note of the awesome and flattering NJC Dusty79 hosted for new and original characters for the Cantina: NJC #85.

Season 1 Index:
Episode 1 Some People Call Him The Space Cowboy
Episode 2 Bromancing The Stone
Episode 3 Bad Boys Bad Boys
Webisode: Friends In Low Places
Episode 4 Pocket Full Of Kryptonite
Episode 5 Realtor To The Stars
Episode 6 Who Shot J.R.? aka The Time I Customized Pluv
Episode 7 (part 1) Dude Looks Like A Lady
Episode 7 (part 2) Breakin' The Law
Webisode: Fans of Captain Iron
Webisode: The Colonel's Cantina

Season 2
Episode 1: Strange Brew



Previously on Joe's Cantina (Soundtrack carrying over from end of Season 1: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ahvSgFHzJIc )


“Well hey there, Stranger”
“shushhh blue heathen womannn….”




Big Papa's scratchy voice: "You've heard the rumblings of war coming between the Two Kingdoms, right? You all know that with that ore strike down below us, and with not one but two spaceports here that we gonna be caught smack dab in the middle of any fighting that starts up, right?"



Ajax: "Well Marshal, you get to close the books on your final case, while I get to go take a shower and maybe come back here to play some cards."

Spinner: "No, not final. Remember I had two cold cases I could never close out. I'll enjoy a beer or two tonight in celebration of this one, but now I'm thinking I may never be able to retire until the other is complete."

Ajax: "You never said, what's the other one about."

"Remember the sign we saw in the monorail corridor? Who killed kilcarr?"



{Everybody's Working for the weekend... everybody needs a second chance....}



"Dad! Dad! My show is on!!"


Tense music closes out the "previously on Joe's Cantina" section...




Prologue

Sputnik's voice echoes first throughout, and then in place of the dark void. Lights and sounds combine to fill the empty spaces: {all right, all right, here we go...ahem}

(soundtrack changes) https://youtu.be/fWT8CSVMynk


GUITAR SCREECHES TO LIFE


{I'm not a man, or machine, I'm just something in-between, WHOA, OH, WHOA, WHOA


{I'm all love, a dynamo
So push the button and let me go
Whoa, oh, whoa, whoa

You want me to come alive
Flick the switch into overdrive
You and me can let it be
Ready (ready), aim (aim), fire

Touch that dial
Turn me on
Start me like a motor
Make me run
Lovin' every minute of it
Lovin' every minute of it

Turn that dial all the way
Shoot me like a rocket into space
Lovin' every minute of it
Lovin' every minute of it
Lovin' every minute of it, c'mon}


Once more a screeching sounds rips through the void, this time slower, but much more painful, until... the guitar ceases, mid-song, followed by electrical hissing, popping, then finally a sound like a cork popping from a bottle of champagne.



{Loving every minu...OH MY GOD!, WHAT THE HELL WAS THAT?!? AND WHAT THE HELL IS THIS NOISE??}




The music is now distinctly different. A slow classical song being played via a violin solo. It would seem that Sputnik's fever dream has been abruptly interrupted.

Sputnik starts to wake up more. {Where am I?}



"You're on my ship. And in my bed" Ajax's familiar voice is heard across the room, as the violin wraps up it's song






{Man, I know I drank a lot, but... Oh dear god, does that mean...?}


"Stop it" Ajax grunts as he finishes up his favorite piece by Vivaldi. (JM70 requested Devil Went Down to Georgia instead, but Ajax feared what that would do to the unconscious man's dreams)


{You stop it, with that god awful racket I mean. My head is literally... figuratively spinning.}

"I'm playing the music to soothe you, Lance. You've had a rough couple days."

{Soothe me, or seduce me? I mean can you get me out of your GD bed already?}

"Ha! Classic Sputnik!"

{I take it JM left my head, er me, somewhere again? what a Dick. Can you help me find where I lost my body?}


"Well that's just it, man. Your body isn't lost"


{Great, even easier to get back to, then. If you'd be so kind as to just show me the way. Let's go.}


"You don't understand. It's not lost, it's gone."


"Don't you remember? I'll fill you in on the way, but come on, we have a meeting to go to. The bounty hunters are all here now."


{Bo..n.yy hun...rs? We don ne... r...scum} Sputnik hated it when people carried him like a grav-ball. They would always cover his voice modulator. {Gd..mit...ha...wn pepl..ca..ry..me lik...gv..bll}


{awys..cvrs..my...voi..md.lator...}
{Gd...dmit}





48 Hours Earlier


...



Welcome to Farhaven’s First DigiNews at Five, with your anchor Jess Dash.

"Tonight on Farhaven's First DigiNews at Five, we wrap up our week long piece on the Aqualarian Invasion, with news on a man, who may not have been a man at all. The loathed being known to human kind initially as a Paladin of Avalonia, but remembered by legend as only The Stranger."

"The Stranger, a man, who almost single handedly turned the tide of the war against humanity..."

Meanwhile, aboard the RAA Trinity, the flagship of the Royal Avalonian Armada, there is buzz in a bunk room for a squad of Cavaliers, only partly due to the news broadcast they are receiving from Farhaven, as they hurtle through space towards that Fringe world.

Sarge: (whispering to one of his men) "Hey, I heard he was back."

Cavalier: "who?"

Sarge: "The Stranger - that man is back...well whether he was ever human, or not, I don't know. But I heard he is back, AND that the Aqualarian Brotherhood is prepping a new invasion..."

Cavalier: "nah, that's B.S. It's Elysia we need to be worried about. I bet they have their own carrier headed to Farhaven even as we speak."


Both soldiers are shushed by the Trinity's Chief Security Officer - "quiet, he's about to go on air"

"To learn more about the Paladin-traitor turned mysterious Stranger, please touch the download button on-screen and obtain direct access to the Encyclopedia Avalonia's complete dossier. A 2 credit download fee will apply."


Jess takes on a serious demeanor: "In other news, we have word of a Royal Avalonian Armada carrier group headed towards Farhaven. Is war brewing? Tensions have been rising since news of the planet's ore strike has circulated between the Two Kingdoms. Might Farhaven be the battleground for a space aged Armageddon?"

Before inexplicably taking on a joyous, lighter tone: "But first, as we continue to celebrate the anniversary of the defeat of the Aqualarians, citizens of Farhaven will get a chance to thank some of the soldiers who helped protect this outpost, when the RAA Trinity arrives later this week. As we all know, the coalition forces between both Kingdoms worked together to win that war, but it is the Royal Avalonian Armada which has spent the most time patrolling the stars above us."

"Right now we are pleased to speak with a special guest who is aboard the Trinity, and can offer his unique perspective on the daily life of a Royal Cavalier. Our guest is a celebrity who needs no introduction. We all simply know him by his legendary byline, The Spectre. The Spectre is a journalist for the Royal Avalonian DigiNews service, among other roles, and have been serving the last few years as a war correspondent occasionally aboard the Trinity. Thank you for taking the time to speak with us today, ahead of your arrival at Farhaven."


"My pleasure, Jess, and hello." The Spectre's perfect digicast voice booms through the Digi waves.

Jess: "Now I wonder if first, you can put to ease the minds of our viewers here on Farhaven about why Avalonia's biggest and best Armada group is headed to the Fringe, generally, and Farhaven, specifically. Is it true that the ore strike we had here 5 years ago is finally resonating throughout the Kingdoms?


Spec: "Certainly it is. Finding a new source of fuel for FTL engines is a prerequisite of mankind journeying further into the Fringe, where as you know, the jumpgates become rarer and rarer discoveries. The recent revelation that the Farhaven ore - Kryptonite as you all jokingly refer to it - is an element which can be adapted as a fuel is certainly going to raise interest in the region as you've no doubt already seen."

Jess: "So then Is the tension that is building between the Two Kingdoms because of this new resource on our homeworld, or is that all overblown?"

Spec: "No, Jess, I think the tension is quite real, but that does not mean any real escalation to the cold war is likely. I know I'm serving as a war correspondent with a squad of RAA Cavaliers, but that doesn't truly mean we expect combat. As always, it is much more likely that we find and engage a pirate fortress than any live combatants from Elysia. But those tensions will no doubt rise if we find ourselves somehow on the same rock as the other Kingdom's forces. Otherwise, as you can see, the soldiers here are prepared, but not especially concerned about any pending conflict."



Jess: "Thank you for that insight, Spectre. Now we've also heard you may be making some time while you are here for a different set of reasons? Can you tell us about that?"

Spec: "I would love to, Jess. As the RAA Trinity continues its patrol of the region, I actually plan to spend the next few months aboard the Artifex, Farhaven's Number 1 Port of Call. I will be accompanied by a squad of Cavaliers essentially on leave, as we wait for the Trinity to make it's return trip back towards Avalonia."

Jess: "Obviously this is your first visit to the Artifex... Is there a special occasion for which we can attribute this visit to Farhaven's, ahem, 'number one ORBITING* spaceport'?" *

*To those in the know, The Artifex (the station that the Cantina calls home) hasn't been the premier port since the new hub was built planetside. It would seem that the Spectre is confusing the hustling bustling planet-side port for the ghost town that is the Artifex.

Spec: "Yes, actually, in addition to being just alive with excitement, it's a great chance to meet and connect with new fans. You may have heard me talk before about how being a reporter for the DigiNews is only one of my jobs. As you may know, it is a very poorly kept secret that I also do some acting on the side. Presently I am the voice of Captain Iron, the title character of the number one children's digicast in Avalonia. We are working to set up an impromptu Captain Iron convention aboard the Artifex - assuming we can still reserve the space on short notice..."

(CUT AWAY TO EMPTY STATION SCENES)




"I understand that our broadcasts do reach your world, and the Commander of the Trinity has allowed me to bring the Captain Iron suit with us, as well. We can't wait to get to meet all the fans of our show..."




meanwhile, aboard the Artifex...
Luc Ajax: "Nobody can stop him! He drives toward the goal...basket...whatev....stupid game, I'd rather be playing grav-ball..."




Loren Ajax: "Jax, honey, you'd play better defense if you dropped your blankey..."




Jax: "Okay Sissy!!"



On screen, the line is repeated: "We can't wait to get to meet all the fans of our show, next week aboard the Artifex."



Luc: "Jaxy, did you hear that?? Captain Iron is coming here!!!!!!"

"YAAAAAY"

"WHOOOOOO"

"uh-huh, uh-huh"




"WE HAVE TO GO FIND AND TELL DAAAAAAAAAAD...."

Loren: "Guys, wait, you can't just...."


Loren - distracted by the communicator in her hand: "What's that? Oh yeah, where was I..."

At Joe's Cantina, Sptunik's Holo Extravaganza was just wrapping up.

SPUTNIK ANNOUNCEMENT OVER P.A.: {Attention fans, thank you for your support of Sputnik's first annual Holo Extravaganza. We will now be taking a short break. Please enjoy this intermission}


The bar was as busy as it had been in years, with many visitors from a cruise line making its way through on a tour of the Fringe Worlds, an event which was a rarity, to say the least.

Even beyond the tourists, an unusual amount of traffic had made its way through the pub in recent days, including a suspicious passenger on a shuttle from Farhaven, and an odd assortment of "spacer" vehicles, freighters and blockade runners, who don't normally frequent the orbital station. The strange shuttle passenger had taken a seat in the corner, purposefully alone.

The presence of these unusual faces, even amidst a crowd of new faces, had not gone unnoticed by everyone. Some of the faces were even familiar to Percy Ajax, who had temporarily left the bar to hit his ship for a quick shower and change of clothes. The reveal of "beavqato" had left him feeling "yucky".

But even while noting the peculiarity, and despite the presence of so many of the best lawmen on the Fringe, it is sad to say that the lawmen of the Cantina were caught with their collective pants down:

Ajax had already left to go clean up.


Marshal Spinner was celebrating a tough case solved with a well earned Harbinger...


Josephus Michealangelo LXX was busying himself trying to discover new ways to annoy Lance Sputnik.

Sputnik was himself still basking in the glow of his successful holo show.


And Officer Jonn was, well... so anyway the lawmen were all pre-occupied.

Luckily, a station like the Artifex doesn't just run on the guile of men alone.

At least one patron was seemingly keeping an eye on things





Spacer 2 to Spacer 1: "Good idea waiting 'til Ajax left. That should make this considerably easier... but why haven't you made your move yet?"

Spacer 1: "The Marshal has taken longer to down his first beer than I hoped. Trying to get them all off balance."

Just then, Ajax returned, freshly shaved and showered (the weeks of chasing 'beavqato' had not left much time for such things).



Chief: "ok guys, make scarce, that dick is back."



Jonn: "Really? You think so? He's helped me with all sorts of law enforcement tips...."


Captain Jungleboot: ""LASER BLAST" him"
Jonn: "You are a nasty little monkey, aren't you?"
"What do you think J?"

Silent Master: ...

Upon returning to the Cantina, Ajax immediately noticed two of those familiar faces again.


One, the raven haired beauty in the back, he recognized from the royal courts of Avalon


...but she seemed to not want to be noticed.

While the other, the hot chick with the dyed white hair was doing everything she could to catch Percy's attention. That one Ajax knew well, as she was a Paladin of Avalonia, who he used to work with often. Nevertheless, he was quite surprised to see her here, out on the Fringe. And traveling by passenger liner no less.

Ajax could tell she was scoping something out. Indeed, he felt it in the air as soon as he walked in. Something was about to go down.

But instead of tipping his hand, Ajax decided to draw the danger out and play it as if he was off his game.


Ajax: "WHOOO THE PARTY HAS RETURNED!


Spacer 2: ""LASER BLAST", Ajax is back"
Spacer 1: "It's too late, we have to make our move anyway. Besides, look at him all over his old lady. I think he's trashed."


Bex is with Percy: "What has gotten in to you?"

Ajax: "Listen, there's something going on here. Get to the back and tell Chief and that quiet tall guy to be on the lookout. Hide behind them until I figure this out."

Bex: "Ok, but I wanna stay away from that monkey. I think he 'likes' me."

Ajax: "ew."


The man introducing himself to all the ladies as Bad Ash is trying to get the attention of Ami. He is laying on the moves.




In the hall outside Luc and Jax stop.


Luc comes up with the idea - "you know, I bet dad is at the place he's always goes to when he claims he's working. JC something?"


Jax: "yay! JC! Let's go there!"


Back inside the bar the strange solitary man from the corner abruptly stood up. He announced through a voice modulator in his mask that he was holding a thermal grenade. He also brandished a nasty looking sidearm.



The reaction flows slowly through the bar, which is still quite noisy. Marshal Spinner and Pluv remain unaware.


Sputnik turns to JM to see what the plan is. {What the? Where did? GDI, He was just here!}

Ajax gets in front of Bex

"go, go"



When Jonn realizes what is up, he pulls out his night stick prepared to set things to order.


Chief: "You heard that he has a gun and a thermal grenade, right?"


Jonn pauses then mouths the words "thermal grenade?" before placing the night stick back in his belt.





As the stand-off intensifies, Ajax hears a distinctive action word spoken aloud, and immediately knows to look for his old colleague Sophia Dante for a hand signal. She then signals clearly to him that there are additional armed gunmen in the crowd, two to each side.




Ajax begins to formulate a plan, while Big Papa watches, enthralled and seemingly entertained...


but...



Just then the Spacers make their move, with two men on the couch to Ajax's right declaring they are taking charge, and that the man in blue is their prisoner.


The apparent leader of the armed men demands the "damn disco lights" be turned off, before they train their sights on the man in blue.





Ami (AM-I) sees what is going on. She complies by sending a code to disable the lighting, then silently signals a station alert. She then powers off the hologram.



Bad Ash witnessing the transformation from 'hotness to botness' as he would later describe it: "Damn dawg. Never mind."



The Spacers to the left train their guns on the lawmen in the group to keep from being overtaken.


Slowly Ajax and Sputnik are able to maneuver everyone out of the way so they can try to take charge.

Dex has been in the line of fire, but in awkward spot, unable to get up or get to his gun. Papa is with him too, and he doesn't want to make a move on the grenade and have something happen. Ajax tells him to get his dad and back off. He intends a diversion to allow that to happen.




Ajax slides over by the man who appears to lead the Spacers. "I've seen you before, yes?"


"Yeah, Ajax, we met. Danb. We were both staking claims on Valhalla 6. I believe you bought me a beer after beating me to the big prize."

Ajax: ""LASER BLAST", this isn't about that, is it? Because man, I took a bath on that claim."

Danb: "No Ajax, this is about HIM." As he point his laser pistol at the masked man in blue.

Ajax: "And who is HE?"

Danb: "The Mysterious Stranger...Brother to all..."

"Family to none" Ajax disbelievingly finished the last line of the famous poem dedicated to the man blamed for the near extinction of the human race.

The man who sunk the Excalibur from within... The Human-turned-Aqualarian. "Sonuvabitch" Ajax took on an intense pose, few in this station had ever seen before. Clearly the revelation of the Stranger's identity had produced violent thoughts.



Ajax skinned his right hand blaster and pointed it at the Stranger's chest. Those who watched gasped, and murmurs were heard such as "he really is that fast."

Another of the armed Spacers, however, moved in to cover him from behind.



And Dex followed Ajax's order to go help out Marshal Spinner at the bar.


But Ajax did not - could not - pull the trigger.

For Stranger was just as fast and a beep alerted everyone that the trigger on the thermal device had been activated, such that dropping him meant blowing everyone out into space.


At the same time that Ajax drew his gun, Sputnik also reacted to hearing the masked man's identity. He growled and lunged forward.



But he lacked the control to turn the anger off, throwing caution to the wind as he began to charge.


Of course, this wouldn't be the first time Sputnik had nabbed a bounty by blowing through a whole station where he was the only one left with oxygen after. But he remembered almost too late that the people here weren't random patrons of a shady bar... these were his friends...his family even (albeit still in a shady bar).

But it was too late to stop, and the Stranger, realizing Sputnik wasn't going to, hurled the device straight at Sputnik's chest, where it magnetically sealed.

Sputnik immediately appreciated what he had done, and what was at stake, so he mechanically opened a compartment in his chest piece and swallowed the device inside.




Ajax gasped "Lance, eject!"

{Aw Frak...} Sputnik had forgot the mod Cap at the armory had given his suit. Had he had the time to do so, he might have reflected here upon whether he should continue to drink the amount of brain damaging alcohol that he did, in light of the fact that his brain was about the only living part left in him:

{EJECT!}
With a click, and slight wooshing sound, Sputnik's domed head began to separate from his body



Those who knew what to expect next took cover, including the Stranger


Sputnik was now helpless. He'd never tested the eject function before, and knew he had no control over where he flew to, or how he'd land.

The dome hovered just above the body, not really ejecting upwards until blue lightning slammed up from the neck of the body.


Sputnik's dome shot straight up away from robotic suit and bounced around in the rafters while the smell of ozone, the cackle of electricity, and the flame inducing ignition of the suit's fuel cells announced to his remaining sensory inputs, that he was about to have a very bad day.


The sound was virtually sucked from the room, just before the entire suit exploded outwards.

KABOOM!!!


Then Sputnik himself came tumbling back down.






{Oh god! Well, I have to say, that actually went better than I thought it might. Is everyone else O..."LASER BLAST"!}

He regretted the self-jinx as soon as he said it.


Crackle, Snapple, POP! Another fuel cell, this one hitting a bit closer to home, ignited.


{Oh man, that stings}





Sputnik opened his eyes. His relief was obvious, though he kept his mouth sealed shut, clearly convincing himself to do so {don't say it, don't say it....nothing? whew!}


The relief was apparent for everyone, as the scattered remains of Sputnik smoked and popped.

But it was right then that the day really did look like it would be bad for everyone: the Ajax boys had just found their dad, and in their excitement ignored the cries to stop from Big Papa, their mom, and Ajax himself.






The Stranger ripped off his mask, and screeched that he had a message for Ajax - and a warning for mankind.


He snatched the Ajax boys and demanded everyone to drop their weapons.


Ajax complied immediately. He would get his chance to regain control of the situation, but he needed time, and had no intent to shoot anywhere near his boys.




Realizing the stakes had changed - Danb did the same.


The man to Percy's left refused to comply, pointing his pistol directly at the Stranger.

Ajax: "Drop the weapon now. If he doesn't end you, I will."


Danb: "Drop it man. You-Know-Who would not approve of this"


{If someone could just kick me a bit closer, I could maybe bite his foot}






Stranger: "War is coming Ajax. I came to make amends, but I see you have no interest in the life of a man bereft of home, world or family. Perhaps, you would listen if you understood better my plight....TELL THAT MAN TO DROP HIS WEAPON, OR I WILL DO THI..."

Suddenly FWIP, "UNGH!" SPLAT!


"What the...?"




Cap, bow in hand, stands in the entrance hatch to JC.




"I told you to drop your God Damn gun!"







Ajax: "Cap, how did you know to come here armed?"






Cap nods to Vox Caeda, the Aqualarian Assassin, who emerged from the shadows next to the Stranger, right as Bex was ready to administer first aid.




Bex: "What the hell Vox?!?"

Vox: "I had to. The Guild demanded it of me"

Bex: "You blue [LASER BLAST]..."



Cap: "If I may, ma'am, Vox didn't tell me to come here so she could kill this man. She told me to find your boys, and keep them safe."

He continues, hat in hand. "It is with my deepest of apologies that I admit I failed at that. I looked, but could not find the wee ones at your home, but I was at least able to track them here."

"But without this lovely lass," Cap nodded once more to Vox, "I'd have never been in position to return and take that shot."


Jax gets put on ground beside Sputnik, and he hugs Lance, saying "Awww... It's ok Puppy. Woof woof. Say it. SAY IT!"

Sputnik: {woof...} then he mutters to self, {GDI}

"Jax, get off of Mr. Sputnik. Luc, we need to get you guys home."


Vox, to Cap: "I think we should get you out of here as well."




{Hello? Guys? A little help? I'm not...feeling...so....is that what I think it is?} - Sputnik then blacks out.


Ajax: "You better start talking man. How'd you know the Mysterious Stranger would be here? And who was the 'You-Know-Who' you referred to before?"


Danb: "I know you don't appreciate this, but your station has had a silent protector for a number of years now. A man quietly powerful, with an underground network of resources, whether via the interstellar webs, the crime families, the Spacers Guild - whoever is needed to get the job done. In this instance it's our Guild. Your benefactor called us here, because he had been tracking the Stranger for several months, and believed he was coming here to make his move."

Ajax: ""LASER BLAST", it turns out he was right. The frakking Mysterious Stranger. But what could it mean? He clearly had a message to send? Was he here for retribution on me? Or on Vox Caeda? Or did he go to such great lenghts to get here so he could defect back? He said he had a warning. That's the part that I'm going to lose sleep over."

Danb nods.

Ajax: "But I have to know who the benefactor is. I need to know if I should thank him, or arrest him. Anyone who operates outside of the bounds of the laws of man should at least be made accountable. I need to know this man."

Danb: "You might be interested to learn he's known you for quite some time. Watched your early career in Avalonia. Had some first hand observations of the kind of man you are and took interest from the get go. It may well be that he steered you here without you even knowing it, that is the depth of his resources."

Ajax: "Led me HERE?" (Ajax looks around the place sardonically) "Well now I need to add 'punch him' to my list of options for when I meet him. But I assume you aren't telling me his name?"

Danb: "You are incorrect. That's the thing. He specifically ordered me to tell you. He knows you cannot find him. He is now more myth than reality, but I can tell you for certain he exists."

Ajax: "So you've at least met him?"

Danb: "No, but an associate of mine knew a man that once did."

Ajax, eyebrow raised: "come on, for real"

Danb: "His name? Baron Wm. Von Kilcarr, deposed Lord of the 5th Barony of Chandar..."

Ajax, jaw slowly dropping: "Chandar? The 5th Barony? I've heard that name. I.... I...was there... The Rebellion... My oath to the King... That, that bastard! TELL ME WHERE HE IS? HE IS A WAR CRIMINAL AND A.... Hold on. Is that the same kilcarr as..." (his thought trailed off unspoken)

Danb: "Trust me, Mr. 'First Sword of Avalon'. What you're referring to is not who he is, anymore than the stories about you define who you are. But rest assured. You will not find him. He is OFFLINE. And when kilcarr is offline, he CANNOT be found."

Tense stares are exchanged.


Dex, from across the bar: "Yo, Percy!, what about these scumsuckers?"

Marshal Spinner arrives as the conversation is ending.



Ajax: "Thanks for the 'helping hand' earlier"

Spinner shrugs: "What can I say, I'm off duty. Also, did I mention I lost my eye last night?"

Ajax to Danb - "You better clear out of here. And take your crew with you before any of the collective law enforcement geniuses aboard this station decide they want a collar."

Danb shrugs and walks away.


Spinner: "What the hell Percy? You can't just let them go"

Ajax: "We have to, if we intend to get the clues we need to solve the next case."

Spinner: "Clues? About what?"


Ajax: "Didn't you say you had one more open case left to resolve?"

Spinner: "wuh??"

Ajax: "The man who hired those Spacers was none other than a man named kilcarr. Who killed kilcarr indeed."

Spinner: "Sonuva"


Joey: "Hey guys, we got a problem. Sputnik doesn't look... conscious... or... alive even?"


AM-I decides the danger is sufficiently resolved to return to normal operation.
Joe Headroom, the station's sentient computer system, which had also went into security mode returns to form.


Ami: "Just another normal day at JCs, huh Boss?"



JM walks back in.

"Hey fellas. What'd I miss?"

Ajax shakes his head.


He picks up Sputnik's dome, and departs.


Spinner: "So what do you propose to do about finding kilcarr then?"


Ajax, "just follow me. I have a plan. But nobody's going to be happy about it..."

JM: "Hey, anyone know whose this is?"

Everyone left in the Cantina, in unison: "It's the Stranger's Gun"
JM, having missed most of the last hour: "Well that just doesn't make any sense.... Does anyone know who this belongs to?"

"HEY! And has anyone seen Sputnik??"


Joey: ...

_________________

Epilogue
NOW BACK TO NORMAL TIME



Ajax: "Ok, Lance, let's head up to the Bridge and see if everyone is ready"



Chase: "Good morning Boss."
Ajax: "Good morning. Dex, you all set?"
Dex: "Well, I'm not done with the assembly yet. Chase said she'd help with the wiring."
Ajax: "And the Bounty Hunters?"
Dex: "Lined up in front of the control pit, just like you asked."
Ajax: "Are we ready to go soon?"
Dex: "Vox is running late. Don't ask. Da Vinci is finishing up some adjustments to the primary engine, and starting the ignition sequence."


Ajax: "Dante - or I guess I can call you Hellfire now that you're back to looking like a Paladin. We're going to need to talk soon so I can find out why you're here. But do me a favor while I'm away, and keep the place from being overrun by anyone?"

Sophia Dante, aka the Hellfire Paladin: "Deal"



"Marshal, thanks for coming"

"This was your plan, Ajax? Bounty Hunters?" (Spinner visibly rolls his... eye)

Ajax: "Here you go Dex"

Dex to Sputnik: "I am sorry for this. Truly."

Ajax: "I believe you've all been briefed on the target and the reward..."



"I should not need to remind you that it is imperative we catch this man alive. We need to know what he knows..."


JM: "Bounty Hunters? We don't need their scum."
Sputnik: {Hey, I just said that...GDI}
JM: "So they tell me you're a hero dude"

Sputnik: {yeah, it's starting to come back to me... saving lives and station and such, no biggie.}
JM: "No, you don't understand. The holo show finale you did, with the classic action movie scene. Explosions, people getting punched, dying. Everyone said it was ultra realistic. PEOPLE LOVED IT"
Sputnik: {...great...}
JM: "No, they can't wait til the next show."
Sputnik: {Seriously? [LASER BLAST]'}
JM: "So hey, where'd you leave your suit this time?"
Sputnik: {god dammit} {Where were you, anyway?}
JM: "You know. When I wasn't at the bar, I was out back, or you know, walking from the bar to out back."
Sputnik: {sigh}


Sputnik: {So who is the competition here among the hunters?}
JM: "Well the first guy there is Jorgus. To be honest, if I see him in my dreams tonight, I may wet the bed."


(Ajax can be heard lecturing still in the background: "So remember, NO DISINTEGRATIONS!")

JM: "Next one is Zalek. If he's not Jorgus's partner, he should be. And let me just say sweet jet pack."


"Then we have the Red Claw. Baby faced killer. Second scariest here after Jorgus, if you ask me"


"Next is the smoothest mofo I've ever seen here man. Moonwalker. I have a feeling we're going to party with that guy."


JM concludes: "And then there's this guy. Says his name is the Red Laser...."

"But look at him. Henceforth, I shall name thee... Mansquito."

Ajax: "ok, everyone but members of the crew...

"ok and you two" (to JM, who had just got up to leave, and Sputnik) - OFF the SHIP! We leave in 10..."


Aeron Cole: "I will make sure the hunters exit immediately, Sir."


Ajax: "Glad you could join us Vox. Please plot a course for Chandar."

Vox: "Chandar?" Vox was surprised... and worried... but tried to not let it show: "Of course."


"And Percy? Cap is going to keep an eye on your family while we're gone."
Ajax: "I know. He always does."


The ship leaves the hangar, and begins to pull away from Farhaven's number 1 Orbiting Space Station...






"Do you ever wonder..."

"Did I leave the stove on?"

ROLL CREDITS

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Post Credits Scene 1:

"Anyone?"

Post Credits Scene 2:

Pluv: "Thanks for taking care of how the place looks, JM. Been waaay too busy to clean it up myself."


Post Credits Scene 3:

"Simply irresistable, she's so fine, there's no tellin' where the money went. She's all mine..."

Post Credits Scene 4:

"Jeebus, that's creepy. I think I just peed a little."

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Appendix...

Below is the dossier download of the Mysterious Stranger referenced during the DigiNews cast. Leave the 2 credits on the counter...
***
Excerpt from The Encyclopedia Avalonia, subject "Early Aqualarian Interaction":
Little did humanity know, the Aqualarians had been capturing human specimens for experimentation long before they revealed their presence in hand with what later became known as the Aqualarian Invasion...

...the extent of which experiments are not fully known...

Excerpt from The Encyclopedia Avalonia, subject "War, Aqualarian Sympathizers":
...the most prominant of which was the disgraced Paladin, Peregrin Arcanum. Arcanum, by the account of every one of the few remaining human survivors, single handedly took down the RAA Excalibur from within, by virtue of his betrayal. The loss of that ship, the flagship and largest carrier of the Royal Avalonian Armada, for a time, swung the momentum of the war firmly within the control of the Aqualarians.

History tells us that momentum returned to humankind only upon the late intervention of the Kingdom of Elysia into the fray, followed quickly by the defection of Aqualarian Assassin Vox Caeda, which led directly to the heroic efforts of Paladin Percival Ajax, First Sword of Avalonia, in his valiant slaying of the Aqualarian Emporer...**

...There is no known conclusion to the Peregrin Arcanum story, however, as his whereabouts remain unknown. Scholars unanimously agree that he survived the "sinking" of the Excalibur, but he vanished without a trace thereafter. Also unknown are any answers as to the nature and cause of his betrayal of his human bretheren...
---

Scholars may not know the path taken by Peregrine Arcanum since the destruction of the RAA Excalibur, but that should not be mistaken for the belief that nobody does.

But before we go there, we first need to go back a bit further. For the story of this enigma of a man began not on that day, but instead with his tragic inception. The truth of the matter would reveal that Peregrine Arcanum's betrayal was of his half-bretheren only, for the fallen Paladin was a stranger not to one, but to two races.

Mankind could never have suspected infiltration within their ranks by an Aqualarian agent, as the physical differences were simply too distinct. Also, as man had remained universally unaware of the Aqualarian Empire's existence until the invasion itself, it seemed impossible to have traitors from within. But the invasion was long in the planning. And the most devastating weapon crafted by the warring alien race was one made of flesh and blood. Flesh of man, and the blue blood of an Aqualarian conquerer. This weapon, this mysterious and conflicted "man" was none other than Paladin Peregrine Arcanum. Brother to all, family to none.

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That was awesome. You really did set up the entire season of story with this one. So many new characters and interactions. Love the new ship diorama. But really this should be Season 2: The Search for Sputnik...'s new body.|

Quick question, where can I find a gun like Stranger's?

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Not enough Bad Ash.

Great stuff.

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I just found this thread, tldr; What'd I miss?

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Classic joemichaels

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WOW,just......WOW!

So Epic I'm reading it a third time. Awesome.

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Looks like I have some catching up to do. I'm going back to read the previous episodes before diving into this one.

OB

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That was great drbindy. Great dios, great story, great photography. Those voice chair ornaments really make nice dio pieces.

And I have arrived as a customizer, one of my customs has appeared in Joe's Cantina.

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This was awesome. My only complaint is that there was WAY too much BadAsh.

I've screenshotted a ton of those pics so I can steal recipes - too much good "LASER BLAST" in there not to

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Thanks guys! This one was strangely intense to shoot. I put myself on kind of a deadline, and also found that a big chunk of the story kind of took on a life of its own as it was being shot. This was the result. lol

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Haven't read the earlier ones, but I will have to now. That was awesome!

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